Parents pressure their 18-year-old daughter to give her car to her 16-year-old brother after she's been paying for it off for two years: 'My parents say that he needs it more now since I’m an adult and should start figuring things out myself.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Apr 30, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

It's tough being the younger sibling in a frugal family. You get so used to getting all of your older siblings' leftover toys, clothes, and technology that you struggle to remember what it's like to get something new. Sure, all of your needs are technically being met, but you can see the discrepancy between you and your older sibling's treatment, and that's no fun. 

On the other hand, a lot of younger siblings get benefits that their older siblings do not. Eldest children often have to adhere to a strict curfew, while their parents let their younger siblings get home at 3 AM without question. In many families, parents are much more critical of older siblings' grades, yelling at them when they get a B+ but sitting pretty when the younger sibling gets straight Cs. Parents might claim they treat their kids exactly the same, but that's easier said than done.

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  • The parents in this story are not treating their kids equally at all. They paid 10% down on a car for their eldest, who has been paying it off herself ever since. Instead of doing the same for their youngest, they asked the oldest to give her car to him. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10500362496
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA for refusing to give my little brother my car after I turned 18?

    I just turned 18 and my parents have been pushing me to give my old car to my 16-year-old brother "as a gift." The thing is, I worked part-time jobs for two years to help pay for that car, it wasn't fully a gift from them. Now that
    via u/Wonderful_Draft8401
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    20 Fise ESOFAMER WE TRUST 93555H 20 DOLLARS
    via Igal Ness

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    I'm 18, I want to keep it while I save up for something better. My parents say I'm being selfish and that "he needs it more now" since I'm an adult and should start "figuring things out myself." I feel like they're trying to guilt-trip me into giving up something I worked hard for. AITA for saying no??
    via u/Wonderful_Draft8401
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    Cheezburger Image 10500388096
    via Joseph Sharp

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 06
    Relevant_Actuary2205 How much of the car did you pay for vs how much your parents paid?
    via u/Relevant_Actuary2205
  • 07
    Wonderful_Draft8401 OP they put down 10% for me to get the car and i got a job as soon as possible so i could pay off the rest myself
    via u/Wonderful_Draft8401
  • 08
    standalone 157 Give your brother the 10% value your parents paid and say "this is what I was given, you get the same". Even that is waaaay more than he deserves, buts it's a thought.
    via u/standalone157
  • 09
    Extreme_Ad1238 OP doesn't have to give the brother anything. the parents can put a down-payment on his car and he can get a job to pay it off. does OP even have a different car if they gave this car away?
    via u/Extreme_Ad1238
  • 10
    abitofasitdown No, 5%, then it's fair between them.
    via u/abitofasitdown
  • 11
    Scenarioing "My parents say I'm being selfish and that "he needs it more now" since I'm an adult and should start "figuring things out myself."" ---Tell them you fufilled their advice. That as an adult, you figured out you shouldn't be taken advantage of and that your younger brother will beneft and advance better in his own adult life from being industrious like you were. NTA.
    via u/Scenarioing
  • 12
    Less-Day5167 NTA, obviously. A: That's your car, if your parents helped or not doesn't change that fact. B: An adult, especially one who needs to "figure things out for themselves", needs a car a fuckton of a lot
    via u/Less-Day5167
  • 13
    more than a 16-year old. C: you presumably bought that car before you turned 18, with money you made. No reason why your brother cannot do the same. parent alert.
    via u/Less-Day5167
  • 14
    EM05L1C3 If it's titled under his parents it is not his car. If they choose to use that against OP they are awful and should owe him everything he paid into it.
    via u/EM05L1C3
  • 15
    AllKindsOfCritters I feel like if that were the case, they would've just told OP "it's your brother's car now."
    via u/AllKindsOfCritters
  • 16
    earth_west_420 As the youngest sibling: You're NTA. If your parents want him to have a car that badly, they can put 10% down on one for him just like they did for you. I wouldnt even give that 10% to him because theyre his parents, not you.
    via u/earth_west_420
  • 17
    Hanging on to your beater(?) while you save up for a nicer car IS the smart, adult, decision here. Maybe when you get that new car you SELL the old one to your sibling for a fair price, but it's pretty ludicrous to expect a teenager to be giving car-priced gifts to their siblings.
    via u/earth_west_420
  • 18
    Unclear if theyre playing favorites, but that does happen with the youngest sometimes. My thought is theyre probably more just tired of parenting and want you all out of the house so theyre trying to push the shortcut on you so he gets a car and they dont have to do anything. But yeah, like others have said, that is your car. At this point your parents don't get a say in how you handle your own property.
    via u/earth_west_420
  • 19
    Maybe a happy compromise would be to tell your little bro he can use it when you're not using IF he pays half the insurance on it and chips in for maintenance costs. But honestly I wouldnt even go that far. Letting anyone else use your car is always a risk. Definitely get his name on the insurance if you do. Personally I'd probably just get him a card with a little cash in it.
    via u/earth_west_420
  • 20
    Fine_Road_3280 Bro probably doesn't have money or job, hence parents wanting him to gift the car. I wouldn't do anything except till bro to get a job
    via u/Fine_Road_3280
  • 21
    Alert-Cranberry-5972 Parents don't want to be inconvenienced with driving the 16 year old around or lend him their vehicle. NTA but the parents are.
    via u/Alert-Cranberry-5972
  • 22
    Recording No7280 They also have the option of buying him a beater and keeping it in their name. They can sell it if they want when he turns 18 and the devaluation can be his "gift" equivalent to the 10%
    via u/RecordingNo7280
  • 23
    Silly_Replacement660 NTA, that's YOUR car. And if they want to play that route aren't parents the one that need to provide? To meet in the middle he can use it on certain days if you're comfortable. But honestly I wouldn't. I can understand if your parents don't have the money to give another car but demanding it after you paid for it as well isn't nice either. Don't give your car that you paid to maintain
    via u/Silly_Replacement660
  • 24
    AddressPowerful 516 NTA Is the title in your name or parents or a combo? Do you pay your own insurance? Will they help replace the car if he wrecks it? If it's all you they can kick rocks and give brother the same deal you got. Tell them to help him figure it out just like they did for you. You shouldn't even give him any money towards the car because that's not your job.
    via u/AddressPowerful516
  • 25
    macross 1984 Oh, c'mon. Just reading the header is NTA Your parents are guilt-tripping you and you are under no obligation to oblige. Besides, your younger brother can work to get his car through sweat and effort like you did. Don't give in and stand your ground. After all, you are an adult.
    via u/macross1984

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teens family drama teenager brother car teenagers siblings down payment bad parenting cars driving raising teens family sister daughter money son
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